Hell has no fury

Hell has no fury 1

After spending 4hours writing my 300-level second semester examination all I wanted to do afterward was to eat away the stress. Ater submitting, I rushed down to our school cafeteria where different food vendors sell their wares. I always prefer mama Caro’s yam pottage with soft cow skin and her spicy egg.  

I am her regular customer, so she served me just the way I like it and in return I handed three hundred naira to her. She gave me an extra cut egg just to wish me success in my just concluded examination. 

”I add this small one for you as success egg” she said while scoping the cut egg from her pot of stew that is filled with varieties of protein.   This is part of the reason why I love her; she is an ever cheerful, an industrious woman who is always in the school cafeteria selling to student who have money and to those who she will have to drag her money from later.  

I was rushing the food when a lanky bodied guy came to meet me to ask for help, he said he was hungry and would appreciate any amount. I looked at him and a part of me was not convinced about him needing help, but I decided to help him anyways.  

As I was about to bring out the money from my short jean trouser, he held my hand and said “Thank you, I am joking” I gave him a side eye and quickly went back to eat. He dragged a seat close to mine and began to introduce himself.  He said so many things and I replied when it was needed, and I also gave him a shallow introduction of myself.  

After I was done eating, I told him I needed to rush down to my hostel, and he said, “I would like to see you again.”  

“If fate permit” I replied. 

“Let’s choose our fate” he responded. 

“How” I asked with a corner eye. 

“Can I have your number please? I mean no harm” he said with a beseeching look. 

I looked at him, having a double mind but decided to give him with the mindset of blocking him he behaves or becomes a pest. I am about rounding up; I need no distraction.  

I gave him my Number and rushed to my hostel to rest. Later in the evening while on my bunk bed discussing with my friends an unknown number kept calling my phone intermittently. 

‘When the parson is tired of flashing, he/she will call’ I hissed and put my phone on silent because the call keeps disturbing my discussion with my friends. 

After talking with my friends, I decided to go through my phone and then saw eight missed calls from the number that was flashing my phone. I sent a text. ‘’Who is this?’’  

‘’Austin, the guy you met earlier today at the cafeteria’ the text came in almost immediately. It was as if he had been waiting for my message.  

When I saw his message, I hissed and concluded I was going to block him, I do not need a pest. I said beneath my breath. 

As if he read my thought, immediately another SMS came in. ”I am sorry if I am doing too much or acting insane.  I am not into stuff like this, please make it easy for us to have a conversation.”

The message softened every hard girl in me, and it made me blush a little. Not sure why, but I did blush.  

I replied to his SMS in a relaxed and accommodating tone, and we graduated to WhatsApp messenger.

Hell has no fury 2

We become good friends, not a day will pass without us asking about our day and what the next day will be like. We attended school fellowship, read and ate at the cafeteria together. He was in his final year while I was in my 300 level. 

 We grew fond of each other and whenever we were unoccupied, we spent time together. He became the bestie I have been longing to have but we never asked about our romantic relationship. He never asked if I had a lover or not and I feared asking if he had a girl because I felt he might have, and I do not want to hurt myself or spoil the friendship and attention I was enjoying.  

My roommates liked him because he was a likeable person and they loved having him around, especially Buki. She likes to talk about him, how fine he is, his intelligence and humble nature. Every time she brings his topic up, I find myself drooling.  The girls used to tease me for been in love with someone that is not my boyfriend.  

Ever since I broke up with my Ex-boyfriend due to cheating scandals, I have not been able to give another guy a chance until Austin came into the picture. If I should be truthful with myself, I love him without knowing.  

During one of our usual hangouts at the cafeteria he asked if I will be free on valentine’s day because he will want to spend the day with me. I nearly screamed yes to him but comported myself.  

I looked forward to the day even though it was two months ahead of time. I was counting days and day dreaming of how it will be like.  

The day finally came, and I wore a Manchester united jersey on a plain black jean, I wore the jersey because he is a fanatic of Manchester United F.C English football club. 

My hair was neatly done, and I complimented my looks with a pair of stud earrings and a little makeup. 

He came to our hostel and had a chill chat with the girls before we left. 

He took me to a not so fancy restaurant, but it never matters because with him everything is beautiful. We had fried rice, drinks as main meal then got ice-cream and meat pie after our meal. While we were eating I brough out a tiny box from my handbag and gave it to him. 

He looked perplexed and asked what it was. 

“Open it, I pray your girlfriend will not cut off my head” I said with my heart in my mouth. I was praying deep down he would counter the allegations. he smiled and opened his gift to see a nice male leather wristwatch. he smiled and looked at me. 

“I do not have much to get you gifts after planning for our meal, I promise to make it up” he said. 

“It is not a competition; do you like it? I asked. 

‘’Oh yes, I love it’’ He responded as he places the wristwatch on his fine shinny sink. 

I was blushing hard and a part of me was waiting for him to talk about his girlfriend or start a conversation that will bring that up. 

He removed his former watch and put on the one I bought, and he never stopped smiling. I loved the fact he loved it even though it was not expensive, but it cost me a fortune. 

After staring at each other for a few minutes he held my hands and said “you earlier talked about a girlfriend” my heart flew. 

Hell has no fury 3

” I will be lying if I say I have never dated before, I have dated three ladies and the last one did not end well so I have been friend zoning every lady I feel I might have feelings for” 

 My heart cringed and felt a sense of jealousness. It means I am not the only close girlfriend he has, and I did not notice or know about him having close female friends until he told me. 

“However, I do not think I can continue hiding my feelings for you Tessy, I want us to be an item, I mean I want us to be more than friends” he continued. 

“What will happen to the other ladies on the line?” I asked with a stern tune. 

“Common on Tessy, I never promised anybody love or relationship. We are just friends; I am not hurting anyone” I looked at him and was waiting for his face to give me a clue if he was lying but all I saw was sincerity.  

I told him I would think about it even when I knew my answer was yes.  He asked me to take my time and the evening was well spent.  

We spoke about lots of things, laughed and made fun of each other and had a good time before calling it a day. 

After two days I asked him to come over to my hostel since we both are free on that day and my roommates were having classes. He came and I prepared indomi for us to eat. 

  I laid on the floor after eating so I could rest my body after rushing the food like a thief. You will not blame me, Austin is a fast eater, and he will always say either I keep to his pace, or I go hungry so whenever I am eating with him, it is always a vying scene. 

he came close to where I was, smiled and said, “You are learning fast, just don’t kill yourself in the process”. 

There is something about his smile that makes my heart beat fast. I blinked my eyes and gently hit his arm and smiled. 

“You have not given me an answer Tessy, when will it be?” He asked. 

I did not want to give him an ordinary yes so, I asked him to close his eyes even though my heart was telling me not to be too forward but truthfully, I could not resist the urge to kiss his lips and get a feel of it. 

as he was closing his eyes, I brought my face close to his face and used my nose to rub his while I located his lips and kissed him as if my life depended on it. 

 He reciprocated instantly and the moment was magical. I said yes to him, and that day resulted to a beautiful walk of love with Austin. 

Austin is the ideal man for every woman, and he is my answer prayers. We studied together, go for scripture union together and make sure we inform each other of any educational/ skill program. Our dating life was not just for fun, we knew we will end up together and we acted the part in all forms.  

We respected and was faithful to one another. If we were not doing school runs, we are together until the day he graduated.  Austin leaving school before me was a hard pill to swallow because I could not imagine staying without him. 

Austin was ready to do anything to make me happy reason why he took it upon himself to be visiting every weekend until I asked him to stop due to stress and the risk involved. Moreover, I was also rounding up and soon we will be together forever. so, I thought. 

Hell has no fury 4

We overcame the feeling of loneliness that distance brings by staying connected through calls, texts, and video calls. Our relationship was the envy of anyone who knew or met us.  

Though we had days of disagreements, not a day went by without resolving any issues. Austine was not just a good man but also a wonderful lover who made our relationship journey easy and sweet. 

I graduated while he was serving, and as soon as he finished his service, he landed a job. Meanwhile, I went on to serve. During my service, Austin surprised me by proposing in the presence of my family and friends. 

 I didn’t know how he pulled it off, but he did an excellent job. 

 I cried tears of joy on my engagement day, and that night will always hold a special place in my heart. 

We became engaged, and life unfolded according to plan. Austin never made me doubt his love and loyalty. His logical and sincere approach to everything reassured me. He included me in all his plans, ensuring I felt a part of his life. Austin consistently went out of his way to make sure I was okay, always complimenting my dress, hairdo, and intelligence. 

Under Austin’s influence, my self-esteem grew stronger. In return, I loved him wholeheartedly, acting as if we were already married. I didn’t entertain the thought of getting to know any other guy because I couldn’t see a reason to do so. 

Austin excelled at work, concurrently planning to launch a business. I completed my service and secured a job, and the next item on our agenda was getting married. 

After dating for three years, I was certain Austin was the one. I had never trusted any of my exes the way I trusted and loved Austin. He made our relationship enjoyable and easy, and the idea of spending forever with him was not something to be deliberated on.  

We got married, and our life together was smooth sailing. Contrary to the common belief that the first few years of marriage are challenging, Austin and I lived in harmony, respecting each other and actively participating in church activities. We were the epitome of an ideal couple, eagerly anticipating the day we could start our family. 

“One day when we start having kids, do you plan to stay at home to take care of them, you workaholic?” Austin asked one morning as we both rushed off to work. 

“I can give our kids a few years of my life, Papi,” I replied jokingly. 

Even before we got married, we had discussed that I would take a break from work when our kids arrived. We aimed to have three children regardless of their gender, and we wanted to expedite the process. 

Austin’s income was five times larger than mine, but I continued working because we hadn’t started our family yet. He urged me to quit due to the pressure, stress and lower take-home pay, but I reassured him, promising that I would soon leave as I had plans. 

Our life remained beautiful until after two years, and there was no sign of a baby coming. Each time my period arrived, I couldn’t help but feel a tinge of sadness, wishing it would stop coming. 

Hell has no fury 5

Austin always reminded me not to worry, assuring me that with or without children, he was content as long as he was married to me. His words were comforting, but in his absence or when I encountered kids, emotions overwhelmed me. 

 My friends, newly married, were starting families, and some were already expecting. Meanwhile, there were no signs of pregnancy for me.  

I never missed my period, nor did I experience a miscarriage, the absence of conception weighed heavily on me. 

It was a challenging time, Austin never pressured me about having children but whenever I saw him playing with children in church, I felt this sense of guilt crushing my heart for not being able to make him a father. 

 I knew he longed to experience fatherhood and the sleepless nights that comes with it, as his friends often shared when we visited them. 

After our fifth anniversary, my preoccupation with the lack of children became overwhelming. I found myself lost in thoughts and daydreams about having kids. I even began placing baby items in the middle of our living room, asking Austin not to move them. 

I suggested going to the hospital, but Austin resisted, dismissing it as unnecessary medical nonsense. He believed that once I stopped worrying, we would conceive.  

While my in-laws were supportive, my mother-in-law’s frequent inquiries served as a reminder of my unfulfilled role in my husband’s house. 

“How are you, Tessy baby? Are you okay?” she asked during one of her calls. 

“Mama, I am fine, just feeling sick,” I replied. 

“I pray this sickness is a good one, and it will be, in Jesus’ name.” She said  

“Amen,” I responded. 

Deep down, I wanted the sickness to be a sign of pregnancy. In fact, I started acting as if I were pregnant, craving certain foods and constantly asking Austin to rub my waist and tummy.  

He complied with every request without questioning. This continued until I saw my monthly flow. 

I wailed in the bathroom, hitting myself against the tiles and shouting in frustration.  

“For how long, Lord? This waiting period is taking its toll on me, and it’s hard to endure. What have I done?” I screamed, drawing Austin to where I was. 

 Despite his attempts to console me, I felt beyond consolation. 

Hell has no fury 6

I squeezed my tummy as if they were oranges. Why is life filled with hard puzzles? Why do we have to struggle? Why can’t things just happen the way they should so we can live in peace and joy? Every day, I questioned my maker, begging and praying for my miracle.

Austin was an incredible support system, the kind anyone would be lucky to have. However, there were times when support, love, and care seemed to amplify the pain. I found myself feeling like a failure, questioning my womanhood, and enduring the worst of it all – the hurtful remarks from people.

“You still dey do sisi iyawo, you better born wetin you won born fast, make you fit rest. I know say all of una wey go school dey like do like oyibo,” a lady who sold frozen food in our area once commented when she saw how I dressed for a program.

The congratulations I received from people when my tummy bloated due to menstruation, the side talk from friends – it was all horrible.

One day, Buki came to our house and had the audacity to question me, “Tee, I hope it is not the after pill you use to take that is preventing you from conceiving, so that I can stop talking taking it, oh,” she said with a sarcastic laugh.

I felt like slapping her head against the wall. I never took the morning-after pill, not for one day. How could she make such a statement in front of my husband?

I questioned her angrily, “What do you mean by after pill? Have I ever told you I took after pill?” Uncomfortable, I asked her to leave.

Austin thought I went too far, but I didn’t care. It was a height of disrespect, and coming from my friend made it dehumanizing.

After the incident with Buki, I pressured Austin to see a doctor. The way he looked at me sometimes seemed accusing, and I couldn’t bear the thought of my husband believing I was the problem due to something I didn’t do.

After much back and forth, he accepted, saying, “My lady, you know I will do anything for you, and just know I did not marry you because of children. I love you, and I am okay and happy having you. If God says we will have kids, wonderful, and if He chooses not to, I am okay and happy with you, honey.” His words were compassionate, and I cried into his arms, allowing the emotions to flow.

After going back and forth, we went to the hospital for fertility tests, every test I conducted was perfect and when his result came out it showed he had cystic fibrosis gene mutation.

Hell has no fury 7

We received the results, and the doctor explained that Cystic Fibrosis (CF) is a genetic disorder caused by mutations in the CFTR gene. The CFTR gene provides instructions for making a protein called the cystic fibrosis transmembrane conductance regulator (CFTR). This protein plays a crucial role in regulating the movement of salt and water across cell membranes, especially in the epithelial cells lining the respiratory, digestive, and reproductive systems.

The doctor also conveyed that there is hope for us to have children. Sperm production in the testicles is typically normal in 90 percent of men with CF and CBAVD. This means that most men with CF can still have biological children through assisted reproductive technology (ART).

However, I noticed that the Austin I went to the hospital with wasn’t the Austin I was bringing back home. He seemed lost, just staring into nothingness. Fortunately, I could drive, so I took us back home.

Austin became a shadow of himself. I tried talking to him, employing every possible means to ease his pain, but nothing seemed to work. At some point, I suggested that we see a therapist, but he refused, becoming increasingly aggressive and defensive.

He started losing the little weight he had. I witnessed my husband losing himself, and I desperately attempted to help him. I read articles online on how to help him find happiness in our situation. I reassured him of my commitment, promising to stand by him until death do us part.

“My dear man, papi, my love, I know you’re going through a lot, and I might never understand how it feels. But one thing I want you to know is that I will always be with you until the wheels fall off. It’s a promise I made and take seriously,” I said one day while consoling him in our bedroom.

“Tee, I am broken. I see all that you’re doing for me to feel better, but I can’t be happy. The results keep haunting me. My heart breaks when I realize I am the cause of our childlessness,” he responded amidst tears.

“I am hurting too, but this is our cross. We need to stay strong for each other, papi. This new you is killing me. It makes me sad. Please, papi, help me. I want you back,” I begged.

“How can I be okay when I know I am the reason for our childlessness? You don’t understand, Tee. You can never understand. You can never know what it feels like to be told you can’t have a child when I never did anything to warrant it,” he shouted.

“I know, papi. I understand,” I tried responding before he cut in.

“You don’t understand. Let me be, please. Leave me alone. I just want to be alone,” he screamed.

This is the new him – the one who gets angry over little things, the new being who screams and shouts while trying to voice out what is going on in his mind. I left the room and went to the parlour to cry my eyes out. My once happy home became a sad place in just two days.

Sometimes, I wish I never pushed for us to go for the test. I wish to have my husband back, but it seems as though the man I married has been carried away with the winds.

Hell has no Fury 8

His pain was consuming the best part of him, and I felt helpless. Austin began drinking, staying out late, and, at times, acting as if he were avoiding me. I struggled to comprehend how someone could change so rapidly—from the best version of himself to the worst.

He returned home very late, reeking of alcohol, choosing to sleep in the parlour.

One night, tired of his new attitude and feeling the toll on my own well-being, I tried to keep my emotions in check as I attended to him in his drunken state.

“Papi, let’s bathe and sleep in our bed. It’s been too long since we’ve slept together, and I miss your touch.”

“What touch, Tee? You want to mock me? What touch? The doctor said I can’t father a child, no need for anything. Just let me be,” he said, staggering towards the room.

I followed him, attempting to persuade him to bathe, but he pushed my hands away.

“Woman, stay away from me,” he retorted.

“No, papi, you are killing yourself, and you are killing me. I am no longer happy in this marriage. I am falling apart. Can’t we face this together? After all, the doctor said we can get pregnant through elective—”

“You’re tired already?” He laughed sarcastically.

“No, no, no. Don’t misunderstand me, papi,” I tried explaining.

“I knew you’d get tired. It’s okay to be tired. So what’s next? You want to leave me, huh?” He asked, pushing his face and hands toward me.

“Papi, please stop. Hold yourself. This is not what I meant, and you know it,” I responded, trying to restrain him.

“Leave me, don’t touch me. You want to leave me, huh? Leave, then,” he emphasized the words.

“I’m not doing this with you,” I said, attempting to excuse myself.

He pushed me against the wall and pinned me down. “You want to leave me, Tee?” he asked, looking into my eyes.

I remained silent, gazing at the man I love wasting away. Tears fell uncontrollably, and I wished I could scream, but I held back, avoiding anything that might lead to confrontation.

He looked at me for a long moment before staggering away. I sat on the floor, hands clasped to my chest, crying silently. “Lord, help me. This is getting too much,” I prayed.

The next day, while Austin was having breakfast, a call came in. He quickly gulped his tea, rushed out to pick up the car, and answered the call away from my presence. I watched from the window, wondering why he couldn’t take the call in front of me. The way he answered seemed suspicious. Clutching his phone to his ear with his shoulder, he drove off, leaving me with a sense of unease.

Hell has no fury 9

As he drove away, my mind raced, wondering who called and why he had to rush off. Despite the turmoil within, I stayed calm, quickly prepared for work, and hurried out.

During lunchtime, I reminded him to eat and encouraged him to message if he needed to talk—our routine before the fertility test. We used to keep in touch during the day, gossiping about work.
Although we’d stopped after the hospital appointment, I decided to bring it back. I longed for our normal life.

He read my message and replied with a simple “Thanks.”

The unexpected response left me uneasy. I resisted opening the message, choosing to focus on work.
Later, at the fuel station after work, I spotted my husband standing beside his car in the second lane. He was in line after the first vehicle.

I tried to call him but hesitated when I noticed he wasn’t alone; there was a lady in the front seat, chatting casually.
He seemed relaxed, and I couldn’t shake the feeling of neglect. Anger surged within me, but I held my composure.

I watched as he bought fuel, the lady handing him his ATM card. After paying, he drove off. I felt lost, realizing I had been holding up the queue I drove home with my anger simmering beneath the surface.

He returned after I finished eating, looking different from the person who had been at ease with someone else. Although my mind raced with questions, I refrained from asking about the lady in the car.
What if she was a coworker? What if there was a reasonable explanation? Despite my internal turmoil, I didn’t want to instigate a confrontation.

I strived to be a good wife, friend, and confidante, suppressing my pain. I apologized on his behalf, attempting to avoid any confrontation. However, my efforts were challenged when a call came in late at night while we were watching the 10 p.m. news. He answered with monosyllabic responses, his eyes fixed on the television.

Curiosity and concern overcame me. “Who was that?” I asked.

“Office secretary,” he responded, still focused on the TV.

“Why is she calling you at this time?” I queried, my anger escalating.

He ignored me, prompting me to raise my voice. “Why, for heaven’s sake, is she calling you at 10 p.m.?” I yelled.

Finally, he turned to me and mumbled, “She wanted to be sure everything was okay,” stuttering as he spoke.

Helly has no fury 10

“What is she calling to know about?” I queried.
“She noticed I was having a gloomy day at work, and she wanted to know what was wrong,” he responded.

“Is she the lady I saw you with at the fueling station today?” I asked.

He looked shocked and responded, “You saw me today?”

“Yes, I did,” I replied. “Hope you didn’t think it out of the box. She’s my office secretary and nothing more.” He tried reassuring me, but something was off about his voice and countenance.’

I couldn’t place or figure out what was wrong, but I knew something was amiss.
I looked straight into his eyes, and he couldn’t meet my gaze.

He was blinking at intervals, and his hands seemed unstable.

“What is her name?” I asked.

“Jane,” he responded.

I silently prayed for it not to be a sign that my loving husband had gone against our vows. I went to the room, and he followed me.

“Tee, can we talk?” he asked.

“Talk about what?” I responded, lying on the bed, my mind flying out of its socket.

“Us,” he answered.

“What are we talking about? Tell me because I do not understand anymore,” I replied.

He came to where I was and held me in a tight hug. I couldn’t understand his actions, but my heart was not settled. It was everywhere, like a hovering plane looking for a safe landing spot.
I held him close with a silent prayer. “Please, Lord, let my fears be untrue. Let my heart be at rest and let my home feel safe and at peace again.”

We made out that night, but the lovemaking was different. It was like two strangers meeting. His touch, his voice, and every move of his waist — something was odd, but I couldn’t pinpoint it. After making out, he rolled over and faced the wall, very unlike him.

I stood up to wash, but my mind kept going back to the lady in the car, and her name kept coming to my head. To worsen it, the sex was just not how it used to be. Why did he roll over without cuddling me? Why was it so different? My head was buzzing that night, but I composed myself and tried to get some sleep.

For some weird reason, I just did not trust my husband and Jane. I wanted to get a lot of information and get facts by myself without asking my husband because I couldn’t make sense of the fact that a lady would be calling a married man at 10 pm to ask how he is when she knows he has a wife.

I decided to go through his phone one night while he was asleep. I knew his password from our dating years but never saw any reason to go through his phone. I trusted Austin with my life. I knew and felt he would never cheat on me. I trusted his word and knew he loved me so much that he would not want to lose me.

That night, I went through his phone because I wanted to clarify my curious mind and live a normal, happy life with my husband. I went to search for Jane’s number on his WhatsApp chat, and all I saw was work-related stuff and times when she asked about his health.

I was relieved not to have found anything that pointed to him cheating with her.

I was about to log off when I spotted his best friend’s chat, Deji. Deji was asking him how he was going to cut off Buki since it seemed like she didn’t want to let go. My mind went off the roof.

Hell has no fury 11

I sat down on the floor, scrolling through the chat at the fastest speed possible. As I retraced their conversations, I noticed a significant gap until our hospital visit.

It dawned on me that Austin had known about his illness and kept it a secret. The shocking revelation came when he confirmed to Deji that he was having an affair with Buki—my roommate from school who used to sing praises of Austin all the time.

Buki, who had disrespected me in my house, Buki who is a married woman. The betrayal was beyond belief.

Despite my fear, I searched for Buki’s contact on his WhatsApp. Opening their chat, I discovered that some messages had been deleted.

I saw traces of her reply to an already deleted conversation, sending him pictures of herself in new clothes and seeking his opinion.

I looked at my peacefully sleeping husband and pondered on the cruelty humans could hide behind seemingly kind actions. I questioned where I had gone wrong, but my mind couldn’t pinpoint any mistakes.

Realizing that nobody is perfect, I acknowledged my efforts to be the best wife. Sitting in confusion, I found myself tapping him.

Quickly, I took out my phone to record our conversation. After the third tap, he woke up, and I asked him, “Why?”

In his drowsy state, he managed to sit up and asked, “What is it, Honey?” His voice angered me, intensifying the pain I felt. I bit my lower lip and showed him his chat with Buki.

Initially, he tried denying any wrongdoing, but I confronted him with evidence. I spoke directly into his eyes in the dimly lit room, “I know about the hotel appointment, the money you sent her, and that she doesn’t want to let you go.”

As he tried to approach me, I threatened, “If you touch me, I will kill you.” He knelt down, crying, apologizing for his mistake.

“Not once, not twice, and you call it a mistake, Austin?” I asked with frustration. I questioned him about where I had gone wrong, why he lied about his health, and why he broke our marital vows.

“Oh shit, you saw that too?” he exclaimed.

“Yes, I did,” I replied sarcastically. He defended his actions, claiming he didn’t want to lose me.

“We shared everything, or so I thought. How could you keep such a secret from me?” I screamed back at him. Heartbroken, I expressed my disappointment, questioning his betrayal.

“I trusted you, loved you, worshipped the ground you walked on. Why did you do this to us, Austin? Why have you broken the seal of trust?” I cried amidst my tears.

“I am sorry, Honey, I am sorry, please,” he pleaded.

Unable to comprehend the situation, I stood up, got into a gown, and left. He tried following me, but I threatened to hit him with my car. Driving away at 2 am, I reached a location where his car was left behind.

Lost in my thoughts, I cried and hit the steering wheel as flashes of the messages haunted me. Desperate for distraction, I spotted a club and decided to drown my sorrows in loud music. Inside the club, I realized I didn’t have cash but had my phone.

Removing my wedding band, I approached the bar, requesting a shot that would make me forget my pain.

The waiter, polite and accommodating, left to fulfill my request. As I waited, my eyes met those of a tall, dark stranger.

Despite the dim light, the brightness of his eyes captivated me. For a moment, the pain in my heart faded, and I found solace in the gaze of this mysterious stranger.

Hell has no fury 12

The section where I was in the club had no seats, only a cocktail stand. I used my elbow to rest on the stand and placed my forehead in my palm to break from his charms.

“Why would a fine lady be alone?” a sweet, soft masculine voice asked, and as I raised my head, it was the face of the mysterious man.

His perfume and voice matched his look; his skin was dark and shiny, as if he applied olive oil. His teeth were as white as pearls. He was beautiful, too beautiful for a man.

Merely looking at him made me curious about how his embrace would feel, wanting to soak myself in his body and savor every scent of his.

I chuckled and said, “Good morning or good evening, whichever one is correct.”

He replied in the lowest tone, getting close to my ears, “Damn what the time says, beautiful.”

I looked at him, noticing the flirtatious way he was looking at me. I was ready for whatever might come my way.

We got talking, drinking, and laughing so loudly, the alcohol we were taking seemed to have its effect. After about thirty minutes, I asked him to follow me to the restroom, which he did.

I woke up in my car with the mysterious man by my side. I remembered we were too drunk to drive, so we slept in my car.

I woke up feeling guilty for my actions but had to compose myself and wake him up. He looked stunning for someone who had just woken up.

“I have to go, Mr.,” I said when I saw his eyes open.

He stretched his body and asked me why I was rushing.

“Please get down from my car,” I responded, feeling annoyed.

“Relax, beautiful, I will,” he said, trying to calm me down. “My name is Mark, what about you?” he asked.

“Theresa,” I responded nonchalantly.

“I would love to see you again. Can I get your number?” he asked.

“I do not give my number to strangers. I am not sure I want to see you again,” I said, even though I didn’t believe myself. I wanted to see him again, laugh the way I did with him and be free from pain.

“I do not believe you; your body language is not the same as your words,” he responded.

I swallowed my spit and opened the door for him. He looked at me, shook his head, and dropped his card on the seat.

“I will be expecting your call, beautiful. I had fun last night, and I do not mind having the same fun with you always,” he said.

“OUT!” I screamed.

He looked at me before going out. I watched him walk towards his car and I drove off before him.

While driving back home, reality began to set in. Guilt, palpitation, and anxiety took over me all at once. I managed to drive home, and as soon as I opened the door, I saw Austin in a vulnerable state.

I felt pity for him, but I moved past him to go to the room.

“Tee, welcome home. I was worried. How are you?” he asked in a concerned tone.

I wanted to reply, but the pain he had caused me was so immense that I couldn’t respond to anything concerning him. I asked him to move so I could pass. He stood for a few minutes before allowing me to pass.

I got into my room, feeling dirty and crazy, as if my heart would explode. I wished I could undo a lot of things, but the past would always be in the past.

In that moment, I quickly searched for Buki’s husband on Facebook and chatted him up. I told him about everything and sent the recording I had made with my husband.

Hell has no fury 13

After sending the message, I took a bath and slept off. When I woke up, I noticed food on the bed, but I ignored it and drove out to get something to eat, attempting to walk my sorrows away.

In the eatery parking lot, I found Mark’s card and kept it inside my car’s storage compartment before going in to eat. “I will not call him; I have no reason to call him,” I told myself.

After eating, I drove back home and secluded myself in the guest room.

I was certain a lot might have transpired in Buki’s house after I sent her husband the recording, and I was indifferent. I wanted her to feel my pain in a different dimension, to make her home feel the repercussions of her actions, just as her actions had shattered my heart.

She kept calling and sending messages, to which I never responded, eventually blocking her everywhere.

I’m sure she must have informed Austin, but he lacked the courage to confront me.

Austin persisted in trying to win me back, attempting various ways to please me, but I was emotionally detached.

My heart couldn’t trust him, and I couldn’t fathom why he sought solace in the arms of another woman when I was tirelessly helping him through his medical situation.

The pain outweighed his excuses, so I remained unmoved by any of his pleas until he sent me details about a reservation, he made for us in a beach house.

He wanted us to go somewhere far from home to discuss, to revive the fire and love in our marriage.

Initially inclined to decline, I considered the effort and money invested, so I reluctantly agreed to the vacation with him.

Throughout our vacation, it was evident that my soul had departed, leaving only my physical presence. I remained reserved and quiet whenever I was off my phone, which had become my constant companion during our time away.

I allowed him to take the lead in everything, aware of his diminishing patience, but feeling helpless.

While we sat facing the ocean on the beach, he spoke, “Tee, I miss you, even though you are here. I miss us, I miss the way we used to laugh and play. I miss my sweet girl. Tee, I promise never to try this again. I promise to love you till I die. Please forgive me, Tee.”

“Give me time,” I replied with my hands between my laps, legs crossed, tears in my eyes, watching the ocean waves clap in excitement.

“I will do anything to have you back, Tee,” he said, coming close to my face with his cold body touching mine.

It took every ounce of strength not to recoil from his touch. He came closer, too close, and I felt like I was choking. He wiped the tears from my eyes with his finger and held me in an embrace.

“I am sorry, Tee,” he said amidst tears.

I didn’t say a word. I was tired of crying, feeling hurt and miserable. I wanted to forgive him, to move on, but every time I was alone, the chat kept flashing through my mind.

I allowed him to hold me, and he proceeded to kiss me. It felt strange, and I began to see flashes of the mysterious man I met at the club. I closed my eyes tightly and allowed the moment.

We made out on the beach, and I would describe it as an explosive experiment.

Hell has no fury 14

After our vacation, we gradually started to rebuild our relationship. Austin made continuous efforts to demonstrate his remorse, making numerous sacrifices.
He went above and beyond, from surprising me with thoughtful gifts to actively participating in household chores.

Without my request, he took the initiative to block Buki and erase her number from his contacts.
He consistently kept me informed about his whereabouts, striving to regain my trust.

Despite occasional flashes of the past, the pain was no longer as intense as it had been during the initial betrayal.
About three months after our vacation, I fell ill, and none of my attempts at self-medication seemed effective.
Concerned, Austin took me to the hospital, where the doctor confirmed that I was pregnant.
We repeated the tests multiple times to be certain, and each result affirmed the joyful news.

Austin’s reaction was nothing short of ecstatic; he was overjoyed, expressing his happiness by lifting the doctor and rushing out of the hospital.
He then escorted me to the car, treating me like a princess.
The drive back home was unforgettable. I couldn’t stop smiling, feeling like a new bride under Austin’s adoring gaze and laughter.

One moment he would be driving calmly, and the next, he’d be pounding the steering wheel in excitement.
Before heading home, he even stopped at an eatery, ensuring he got me everything I desired and more.
From the moment of conception until the day I delivered, Austin didn’t let me lift a finger. He took on the role of a devoted caregiver, ensuring I had everything I needed.

His love for me was palpable, and he continued to worship the ground I walked on.

I gave birth to a handsome and adorable boy named Jayden, who inherited all my features and left no room for doubt that he was Austin’s best friend and buddy. Jayden became the source of immense joy and tranquility not just for us but for our extended family as well.

The arrival of our son was celebrated with a shower of gifts and warm wishes, and his dedication ceremony became a memorable event.

Austin’s love for Jayden was profound, and he was ready to go to any length for our little one. A special ritual began when Jayden turned six months old – every Saturday morning, Austin would take him out for brunch every Sunday afternoon.

“I am bonding with my son,” he would proudly declare, and I could witness the joy and pride in his eyes as he did so.

The birth of Jayden revealed a different side of Austin; he transformed into a loving and devoted father, always willing to prioritize the needs of his son above all else.

Our family thrived in an atmosphere of peace, love, and unity, creating a harmonious environment that exceeded all my expectations. The journey of parenthood brought out the best in Austin, and we relished every moment of raising Jayden together.

Hell has no fury 15

Two years after Jayden was born, I found myself on the way to drop him off at school, frantically searching for an envelope containing his school fees details that I was supposed to give to Austin.

Juggling Jayden’s needs often led to moments of duress, making it easy for me to misplace things or forget where I put them. Amidst the chaos, I discovered Mark’s business card, which I had stashed away three years ago in the car’s compartment.

Staring at the elegant card, I hesitated about whether to call him or not. Clutching the card in my left hand, I continued searching for the elusive envelope. Unable to locate it, I decided to take Jayden to school, telling myself, “I’ll find the envelope later.”

As I drove to school, Mark’s face played in my mind, prompting me to flash his number. He called back while I was at Jayden’s school, but I resisted answering despite the butterflies in my stomach. He called again, and this time, I picked up.

“Hello,” I said.

“Hey, who is this, please?” he asked in a low tone, unlike his usual voice. Unsure of what to say after gaslighting him for three years, I hesitated before responding, “This is Theresa.”

“Goodness, Theresa, where have you been?” he said in a much warmer tone, and I felt a sense of validation. Chuckling, I replied, “I have been around.”

“I’m not fine, I’m at home, and I would love to see you again, though,” he said.

“Hmm,” I responded, conflicted and wrestling with my emotions. I loved the way Mark made me feel, and a part of me wanted to see him again.

“I want to see your magical eyes and watch your teeth part when you talk. Mark is a fine man!” I thought to myself. “Where is your house?” I asked.

“I can’t talk much; I’ll text the address. I can’t wait to see you again, beautiful,” he said.

I cut the call, hoping he wouldn’t send the address, which will mean the universe disapproved of our reunion. Unfortunately, he did send it, and without thinking twice, I plugged it into Google Maps for directions. I hesitated outside the gate, torn between going home to Austin and missing Mark.

When I arrived at his estate, I realized he was a successful man. A part of me wanted to turn back, but another part was drawn to him. I called him, and he instructed the gate man to open up.

Walking to his door, my heart was a mix of fear, excitement, and sadness. As I entered, I saw a shirtless Mark reclining on a fancy couch. His physique was on display, and once again, I marveled at his attractiveness. Clearing my throat, I approached him, and he opened his arms for a hug. Sinking into his embrace, I couldn’t help but appreciate how good he smelled.

“Why did you leave without a trace? I prayed for your call,” he whispered into my ears.

Not ready for questions, I wanted to savor the moment. I kept quiet, allowing myself to enjoy the warmth of his body.

“I am here now. What’s wrong with you?” I deflected, steering away from his inquiry.

“Having some fever and I have been working myself. I think I need rest,” he said, guiding me to my seat. Sitting close, he played with my fingers and asked about my preferences for food so he could instruct the cook.

“Anything is fine. What do you have?” I inquired.

“I had English breakfast earlier. Do you want some?” he asked.

“Yes, please, with hot chocolate,” I replied.

He called for the cook, and as she walked in, my heart sank.

Hell has no fury 16

She bore a striking resemblance to Austin’s cousin, but thankfully, she was not the one.

She brought my request after about 20 minutes while discussing with Mark. He tried asking some personal questions which I declined answering in a jovial way. We had a good time, and I drove back home feeling revived and happy.

Immediately I got to the house, I brought out a jotter and wrote down all the important numbers stored on my phone. I was on my casual leave, so I had all the time for myself since Jayden was still in school. After about 2 hours, I was done with the writing; Mark called to check if I was home.

“You promised to call when you get home,” he said.

“I am sorry; I was busy,” I replied.

“I had a good time and would want us to spend more time together. I want to know you better, Theresa. Why are you going on and off with me?” he said while waiting for my reply.

“I got home safe, that is all that matters, Mark,” I responded.

“Please do not tell me you are a ghost; you are scaring me. Why are you turning me down and keeping a lot of your information? Am I your sex toy or what?” he asked, getting pissed off with my behavior.

“I am not a ghost, Mark. I am sorry; what you want from me cannot be given. Goodbye, Mark,” I said and cut the call.

I cut the call and hurriedly brought out my SIM and broke it while crying. How did I get myself into a mess? I hated the fact that I was in a helpless situation.

I hated my new self, my actions, and the type of life I was living. I hated the fact I cannot change the hands of time; I hated the fact I have lots of things to say and I could not say them. I wish I could go back and change things, but it is not possible; the only thing possible was to move on. I tried my best not to show any form of emotion to Austin to prevent suspicion or questioning.

I gave birth to a baby girl nine months after my meeting with Mark, and Austin was again the happiest man on earth. He gave a whole lot for our children and made sure we lacked nothing. Ten years later,
Austin had acquired lots of properties, of which I had custody. He was ready to do anything for the children.

After ten years of living in guilt, mental battles, things I thought I had forgiven Austin about kept coming to my mind, and most times it made me act irrationally towards him. I could move on, but the guilt kept coming.

I could not tell anyone about it. It was a constant back-to-back issue, and at some point, we became distant from each other; he was only attending to the kids while my love was also transferred to them. The environment was toxic, and I had been planning an escape route but could not leave because of what society would label me. But one day, I damned everything and left.

That day, Austin went out after our normal fight, and he slept outside without saying a word to me. I did not call to ask where he was; I arranged all my wears and that of my children and brought them downstairs as early as 5 am.

I took the items to a hotel. My children were sleeping when I was moving the properties, and when they woke up, I told them to hurry and bathe because we are going to meet daddy.

They took their bath, and I drove them to the hotel and drove back home to wait for Austin. When he came back, I told him I needed to have a word with him. He said he was not ready to talk; I said, “You better listen to me now because if I leave this door, a lot of questions will be unanswered.”

He paused and looked at me; I looked at him too, ready for whatever would happen. He sat down and asked me to go ahead.

“The children and I are leaving to start our life elsewhere. I am tired of living with guilt and lies; I am tired of acting happy. I am leaving for good, Austin. Maybe there is no happily ever after anywhere,” I stated.

“You cannot leave with my children without my consent,” he boastfully said.

“That is the issue; I do not think Jayden and Jamimia are yours,” I said, emotionlessly. I saw his eyes widen; I was scared for what will happen, but I was ready to be free.

“I slept with another man the day I drove out, and after two years, I slept with him again, which produced the children,” I said.

“No, no, no, Theresa, nooooooo, you cannot do this to me, nooo,” he said while rushing towards my direction. I ran behind the sofa and told him not to do anything funny.

“They are mine; you cannot take them away from me,” he said with tears.

“How are they yours? I did not get pregnant until I met another man and gave birth to Jayden. I slept with you for two years and did not get pregnant but got pregnant the month I slept with him. How are they yours?” I asked.

He threw his phone at me, and I miraculously dodged it and ran to grab a knife.

“If you touch me, I will stab you to death,” I threatened.

“Who caused all of these? You! If you had kept our vows, I wouldn’t have gone to be in the arms of a stranger who knows nothing about me. If I was told I will cheat in this life, I will doubt it, but you made me do it. You broke my heart and trust. After experiencing motherhood, I realize it is all I needed to heal and live far from you. I do not want to die with this secret. I do not want a man; I do not want marriage. Let me be alone,” I said amidst tears.

He sat on the floor and was crying silently. I moved with my back to the door and said, “I pray you forgive me one day; I never imagined this. I never imagined I will hurt you this bad; it was a harmless mistake, but I chose me in all of it.

I chose to experience motherhood; I chose to feel the sweetest pain. So, when I found out I was pregnant, I kept it. I would have aborted to save my home, but my heart said it was not worth it. You broke our vows once; what is the guarantee you won’t break it again? I pray you find peace.”

I dashed out of the house and drove out. I got to the hotel and cried myself some ocean. My children were shocked, but I assured them everything is fine.

It’s been two months since I left Austin, and I can say I have peace. The kids ask about their dad, and I tell them he traveled.

One day, I will explain to them what happened and maybe look for Mark Edigbon, but for now, I just want to be alone. I do not trust the next person, so let me enjoy the freedom of singleness.

No matter what you are going through, never break your vows. Cheating is mentally, psychologically, and emotionally draining; every action reminds your spouse of it, and nobody forgives and forgets cheating even when they try to. It keeps coming back.

THE END